Mormon Youth Discover Steamy Celibacy Loophole

Rev Mark D

Mormons are fun because they create new gods and new religion as they go, to serve the needs of the one who creates the latest dream that becomes dogma. Talk about a convenient deal and a profitable one too.

tuppennyblue

And they can do this with their magic underpants still in place?

Lionheart

I'm very curious, if there is no moving in and out, how does it get "in" there when they do it, and how do they get it "out" without moving it? Isn't that an in and out movement?

However, it's not as bad another religious ritual, that of removing a little boys foreskin as a baby.

Religious dogma is so weird, and we only have ourselves to blame for it by believing such rubbish. I'm glad I'm out of it!

🦁♥️

Gwendolyn Lord

Sex, the most natural and primal of all acts, prohibited and shameful. Shame, the Great Controller. Weird ways to get around prohibitions, guaranteed to inculcate sexual dysfunction down the line. No real pleasure allowed!

Well, my God/dess says different. Sex is sacred, a sacrament, a holy act between two souls.... when you feel free within yourself, with your partner, and your spiritual practice knows the sacred aspects, and feels comfortable exploring and expressing this, without discomfort, rigidity, shame. Healthy sex. Equal partners in pleasure.

"Soaking" is pure hypocrisy. A sure fire way to be brutally inhibited.

"The earth is my church, and my body is the altar." A bumpersticker I had on one of my old cars, years ago.

Martin Daniels

Sex is sex, from the moment two consenting people decide to have an intimate physical relationship with one another it is sex. Putting the penis in the vagina is an act of sex even though they don’t move. Because at least the boy’s penis has to be erect. So in my humble opinion they have sex.

James

Religion has always been about control. Ask any woman, if they could put a Chasity device on their males, if they would. Religion saw the control properties of keeping men chaste.

Remember in early tribes, religion ruled, so make it a sin to have sex , why? A chaste is more controlled and more productive.

The whole sex thing is religion based, not god based, God said " Go forth and multiply"

Told Abraham, his descendants would be great and many.

No where in quoted text, has God or Jesus came out negatively toward sex.

I think the practice is ridiculous, soaking, and it really must be frustrating to the kids.

Kudo's to the kids for finding a way around a stupid rule.

peace

Douglas Robert Spindler

More than 90 percent of men and women have reported engaging in premarital sex. I have found Mormon women are always the one who are most eager to have sex. Once they are married that's it. Where as guys, if they are Fundamentalist Mormons can have many wives.

I you ever talk to a Mormon wife who is in a plural marriage they will tell you about all of the advantages. They disadvantage according to them are the Christians ridicule them for being in a plural marriage.

Mormons are the nicest people. I have to ask, would you like to live next door to a fundamentalist Christian or a fundamentalist Mormon? I would choose a fundamentalist Mormon every time.

Jay Dwayne Groom

After so many years of marriage I tried this with my wife, but I only found a dry hole. No soaking, only scraping. Ouch.

Judith Louise Jackson

I can't even. Seriously, those children know what they are doing. The excuse is to fool the parents into thinking they didn't have relations. If this works for either parents or leaders who are preaching celibacy then maybe there needs to be a review of leadership and or parenting skills. It's my opinion that you can't tell a teenager not to do something because it's bad. You have to turn it around and make it their choice to do the right thing. Maybe that's just me.

Tim Yorty

Question: Is it a sexual act? - Yes Question: Are the people married? - No (probably not) Question: Is there penetration - Yes Question: Do they think God is stupid or is it just them?
Sin is sin, no matter what you call it.
Even the US Military knows the correct definition: from the UCMJ: Definitions. In this section: (1 ) S e x u a l a c t. The term "sexual act" means— (A ) Contact between the penis and the vulva or anus or mouth, and for purposes of this subparagraph contact involving the penis occurs upon penetration, however slight; or (B) the penetration, however slight, of the vulva or anus or mouth of another by any part of the body or by any object with an intent to abuse, humiliate, harass, or degrade any person or to arouse or gratify the sexual desire of any person. (2) Sexual contact. The term ‘sexual contact’ means— (A) touching, or causing another person to touch, either directly or through the clothing, the genitalia, anus, groin, breast, inner thigh, or buttocks of any person, with an intent to abuse, humiliate, or degrade any person; or (B) any touching, or causing another person to touch, either directly or through the clothing, any body part of any person, if done with an intent to arouse or gratify the sexual desire of any person. Touching may be accomplished by any part of the body.

KNOW THIS: God is NOT mocked.

Gary Clark

This might be a thing but it's still sin. Loopholes really. Trying to trick God. Don't be stupid.

Sarah Raulerson

I think the subject of sex in church needs to reframed. In Biblical times there were no cures for syphilis. It would just drive you crazy and then you would die. Unwed mothers and unwanted children ended up as sex slaves or worse..

So of course sex outside of marriage was a sin...and a pretty bad one. Now sex is different and I think the church should try to evolve with the times and instead of presenting sex as a horrible sin, pose the question...are your sexual relations centered on love and God's plan for a healthy family?

Because as long as we present a person's desire for sex as a taboo people will continue to abandon their faith to get their sexual needs met instead of using wisdom and discernment to decide when they are ready to explore sex as an expression of love within a healthy relationship guided by God's word.

Matthew Leon Reed

This is so very rare, it is not worthy of an article on the subject. Very very few LDS men or women actually think this is OK. It just isn't a thing. AND... once you progress to the point of penetration... please, can you seriously tell me that they aren't going to continue the act to the end? Once you get that far, there is no stopping. OH, and also can you seriously tell me they are going to have a friend standing next to them to jump and down? "Hey, Bill, we are going to have not-really-sex, so can you jump up and down on the bed for us cause we can't move up/down back/forth to do this."

Pulease...this just isn't a thing...

Nicholas J Page

Scientific proof Only one sperm can make a woman pregnant plus the risk of STIs

Bishop William Dusenberry, DD

As a ULC Bishop, with a DD, and several other doctorates (as well as being a FFRR Celebrant who can preform marriages, either ULC administered, or by the FFRF) I advise all Mormons (LDS’ers) to follow the biblical models of what constitutes what some call a marriage.

Firstly, Adam and Eve, never married, nor did Abraham , Moses or the Virgin Mary.

And the Mormons — regardless of what any of them tell you, have a different God than the otherwise Christian God.

How can all of us know this?

Because the Christian God has a son, who after he was tortured to death, by his Christian God father — claimed that he, as Jesus, would “come again” (to our planet Earth) but as of today, there is no record that he’s ever returned.

The Mormon God too, had a son named Jesus, who like the Christian God said he’d come again — who, unlike the Christian God’s son, has already come again - to what is now Missouri some 1000 years ago.

We ULC’ers can either pick a God whose son has already returned to this Earth — as has the Mormon God; or, if they are so inclined, pick a Jesus who has a Christian father, who won’t allow him to return to Earth — as long as the GOP threatens USA Christians with supporting Trump for President again.

And, don’t forget — the only provable God, is the SHP proven God — who never had a son (nor a daughter— as far as we know).

Bishop William Dusenberry, DD

As a ULC Bishop, with a DD, and several other doctorates (as well as being a FFRR Celebrant who can preform marriages, either ULC administered, or by the FFRF) I advise all Mormons (LDS’ers) to follow the biblical models of what constitutes what some call a marriage.

Firstly, Adam and Eve, never married, nor did Abraham , Moses or the Virgin Mary.

And the Mormons — regardless of what any of them tell you, have a different God than the otherwise Christian God.

How can all of us know this?

Because the Christian God has a son, who after he was tortured to death, by his Christian God father — claimed that he, as Jesus, would “come again” (to our planet Earth) but as of today, there is no record that he’s ever returned.

The Mormon God too, had a son named Jesus, who like the Christian God said he’d come again — who, unlike the Christian God’s son, has already come again - to what is now Missouri some 1000 years ago.

We ULC’ers can either pick a God whose son has already returned to this Earth — as has the Mormon God; or, if they are so inclined, pick a Jesus who has a Christian father, who won’t allow him to return to Earth — as long as the GOP threatens USA Christians with supporting Trump for President again.

And, don’t forget — the only provable God, is the SHP proven God — who never had a son (nor a daughter— as far as we know).

Rev Nolan

I absolutely agree with complete abstinence until marriage; however, I strongly advocate marriage when the hormones begin doing their thing AND parents dealing with THAT instead of religious transgressions, unacceptable teenage pregnancies, and having to confess to their bishops that they engaged in acts worthy of callings in the Church

Society needs to learn to live with the facts of life regardless of their religious persuasions or perspectives. People begin masturbating before puberty in the discovery process of their body parts. Nature sets the time clock for exploration with sexual identity, sexual aspirations, and newfound thinking process. Regardless of religious beliefs, these are just facts of life. This means that we have to adapt our belief systems to reality, not the other way around. This means pubescent marriage and responsibilities, youthful grandparenting, and responsible sexual behavior supported by the social network that these young people require to truly be psychologically stable and socially acceptable.

David Arthur Lewis

Makes as much sense as the Magic Underpants.

Daniel Gray

And just how can this be a loophole? According to the Mormon Church in Utah, a Mormon Bride must be pure and chaste and above all, a virgin. Now if she has already allowed someone to do this, then she isnt a virgin now is she? And yes the Boy must also be a virgin as well.

Richard Lee Cornell

That is one way to increase the number of births. He might not be having sex, tell it to the girl who just got pregnant. Sorry nature does not act that way just because someone puts it online. It is like those females of the Catholic faith that have sex without getting pregnant by many means other than the proper way of getting pregnant only to find her lover has gone away after she is knock up.

Andrew John Crowbridge

Why don’t we all just admit, religion is just fashionable in the US. Similar to saying you’re a member of the Lions Club or or the PTO of a school.

Gregory SG

I think it’s ridiculous for all kinds of reasons. The biggest is that both with have to be a roused somehow. So there will have to be some master bating involved. There you have broken the agreement with intent. You don’t put a toothbrush in your mouth to clean your ears. These things need to be taught in a different light. It’s not evil or wrong it’s just not easy to raise a child but is easy to create one. These are my quips on the matter it’s much more involved then a quick statement.

Kevin D White

In the Bible, sensuality is usually listed with other evils that include sexual promiscuity and perversion. Also known as “lewdness” or “debauchery,” sensuality can be defined as “devotion to gratifying bodily appetites; free indulgence in carnal pleasures.” The word sensuality comes from the root word sense, which pertains to our five senses. The Greek word most often translated as “sensuality” means “outrageous conduct, shocking to public decency; wanton violence.” Sensuality is a total devotion to the gratification of the senses, to the exclusion of soul and spirit.

Sensuality is an abuse of our God-given gifts. Those caught up in sensuality abuse the gift of sight by feasting the eyes on forbidden images such as pornography. They may feast the ears on ungodly conversation, jokes, or music (Ephesians 5:4). Those given to sensuality will indulge in “wild parties” (1 Peter 4:3), drug and alcohol abuse (Proverbs 20:1), sexual immorality (Hosea 4:10–11), and foolishness (Mark 7:21–22). The sensual follow the sinful desires of the flesh without boundaries or restraint. Ephesians 4:19 says of the ungodly that, “having lost all sensitivity, they have given themselves over to sensuality so as to indulge in every kind of impurity, and they are full of greed.”

Sensuality is often listed as one characteristic of those who “will not inherit the kingdom of God” (Galatians 5:19–21). When the Bible speaks of sensuality, it implies a loss of control over one’s passions and evil desires. Depraved sexuality is usually a part of it, as well. Romans 1:21–32 gives a detailed digression of those enslaved by sensuality, which leads to sexual perversions and eventually a reprobate mind. Sensuality is in direct opposition to God’s desire for us to live “by the Spirit” (Galatians 5:19, 25). Galatians 5:16 says, “Walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh.” If we are walking by the Spirit, we will not indulge in sensuality.

Sensuality has no place in the life of a child of God (1 Peter 4:3). Romans 8:4 says that Christians “do not walk according to flesh but according to Spirit.” First John 2:15–16 warns us against loving “the things of this world,” which include the “lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life.” Those things summarize the heart of sensuality. Jesus said, “If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself, take up his cross daily and follow me” (Luke 9:23). That “cross” symbolizes death to our old sin nature. No one carried a cross who expected to come back alive. Jesus was saying that, in order to follow Him, we must allow Him to kill that old sin nature, which includes sensuality. We cannot please both Jesus and our flesh (Romans 8:8). Jesus is going in the opposite direction of our flesh. So before we can truly follow Christ, we must be willing to die to our old nature, which includes sensuality (1 Peter 2:24; Romans 6:2, 11).

Minister Raydeen

Is this where you can have two or three wives??? I rest my case

John T Stark

This is just too funny.

Pastor Barton

This website doesn't seem to be inclusive of organized religions. It seems more so for pushing the Democrats Agenda, and making fun anyone with actual Faith.

It's totally possible kids came up with a loophole, just like with Catholics and anal.

Kids these days grew up eating tide pods.

Kids are kids, and that's why we teach them to not do foolish things.

Gwendolyn Siobhan Patton

Reminds me of another comic...

https://images.app.goo.gl/RpZb424WfbTBDvscA

Carla Jakola Smith

What?? I mean I was told by well meaning Christians growing up that I was raising my sons the wrong way. My oldest will be 36 in November and he waited until 30 to have a daughter and get married! 1 wife. 2 daughters. No accidents. My youngest son is 32. No accidents. So I think education and enlightenment about the whole idea, IMHO leads it to be less a “sin” and more a natural biological & physiological need/want. How is that sinful between consenting ADULTS?? I mean the newest division of Moonies worship with AR15s. Sex seems less dangerous if approached responsibly!!😳

Paul C Moore

I was sexually abused as a toddler and that left me with a voracious appetite for sex. Sex was great before I became a Christian, but the condemnation and guilt I felt for having premarital sex was overwhelming. One day I did a short research on fornication and what it really meant. As it turned out, fornication and premarital sex are two very different behaviors.

In Israel, during the time of Roman occupation, there were many pagan temples that had temple prostitutes. Fornication occurred when a man had sex with a temple prostitute thus joining himself to the pagan demon the temple represented through intercourse with the prostitute.

If you choose to believe in the writings of Apostle Paul, he said, "Why be joined to a prostitute?" My girlfriend was not a prostitute, she was someone I loved dearly. I broke off with her because of the pressure my pastor was putting on me and my erroneous belief that I was taking my girlfriend to hell, another erroneous belief.

So, let the Mormons soak. I think a lot of that will lead to more activity which isn't wrong, God made sex good for everyone. It's crazy to think I could put a lid on my sexual passions. My ex girlfriend and I never had children.

Rev. Kev

I think if you know something is wrong that you have to invent a workaround, then you also know the workaround is still doing the wrong thing. That being said, humans have a natural sex drive. And the more its repressed, the more it will find a way to express itself. Even in socially or physically unhealthy ways.

The Bible-based prohibitions against sex before marriage are less about the act of sex and more about conditions in early Palestine. The people in the Bible lived in an agrarian society with no formal wills and estate laws. The entire estate was passed on to the eldest son. Families needed to make sure there were no possible claimants to an estate so sons needed to make sure their wives were virgins. The blood line needed to be "pure" (i.e. free of any other person who may have had sex with the woman and have a child through her). It had nothing to do with virginity being some exalted, special. clean state. Just that no one could lay claim to a family's land and way to make a living.

Bear in mind these rules also took place in a time when the average lifespan was about 30 to 40 years and people got married and started families soon after puberty. So it was a whole lot easier to maintain chastity when a person was married off at the same time the sex drive was really kicking in. Nowadays people don't get married until their late 20s or 30s. If they get married at all. Kinda difficult to be chaste decades after puberty set in. So I think the entire "no sex before marriage" thing needs to be re-examined and not be a Rule for churches.

Rev. Dr. James Jacob Showers Jr

In the 80-90's, you used to hear this type of clatter, in relation to anal intercourse. Are they also using the 'who told you, you were naked, from the Almighty Boos?'

Donald Zanghi

Rev. Don

Tell me ow you enter and withdraw without MOVEMENT !

Marius Gabriel Burja

Stupid question deserves a wise answer. Do pigs have wings?

Angel

This is the most stupidest thing I have ever heard. It's still sex... They should have just allowed masterbation....

Lucia Kay Karakitsios

They discovered Tantric yoga, which has been practiced for thousands of years. There is no movement in Tantric sex. It is an energetic exchange. It can promote vitality in men, because orgasm is not the goal.

Education, is still key, to impart to our youth. Loop holes will continue be found as long as sexuality is shunned, hidden, considered evil, as long as women still dont have sovereign over their own bodies (still looked at as objects, or disrespected or still viewed as whores - what about the boys involed? - they are not called whores)

Ruth E Barbour

We are all answering these questions, right? What do you think – is it reasonable for a religion to decree that its followers abstain from sex until marriage? If it was reasonable to slaughter countless people in the name of god and the holy roman empire, basically anything is reasonable. Are loopholes like soaking truly acts of sin, or just the natural consequence of suppressing human behavior? Religious loopholes are everywhere. Catholic priests raped little boys for decades. The church decides what is "sin", and there are way too many sins if "the consequences of sin is death." And the unasked question: Why this kerfuffle over sex, but not over obesity? Ah.

Candice Beairs'Hodge

It's still sex if his pecker is anywhere near you vagina it sucks but he's moving a big deal if you're getting stimulated by your having sex

Rev. SolomonSaint

Wow...

Michael Gilson

I like Garfunkel and Oats loophole better.

Lawrence Albert Taylor II

I'm sorry that's like saying he went down on her or she went down on him but never had sex. It's still an act of sex. Let's get real as adults we all have some urges. With that being said we are responsible for our actions and consequences. Who are we to judge in this . The individuals involved in " soaking" have their own people to answer to and the ramifications afterwards not us members.

Alysia Ecker

I grew up in the Mormon cult! I left at 19! They excommunicated me for giving up my virginity for the man I had dated for 4 years. I got pregnant w that one time! He was not even talked too by their tribunal of idiots but they said they stripped me of God Jesus and the Holy Spirit for having sex and having a baby! I stood up to this stupid Tribunal of men that think they are all prophets holier than God himself and I Ann innocent young girl shamed them before my God who loves me and has never left me! How dare they hurt people or try too! I had my beautiful daughter from this encounter and found a wonderful husband who accepted her as his! As for this splurging sploshing idiots you don’t have to do anything once the penis is inside because no matter what excitement there is and there always will be SPERM WILL FIND THEIR WAY w or w/o Ejaculation! I don’t live in this stupid mental state anymore but I have a daughter and grandchildren that do. The last idiotic thing I heard was the teenagers in middle school were having Anal sex in the bathrooms cause the girls couldn’t get pregnant and that wasn’t considered Sex! It’s always something!! And Poligamy is still all over the place in Utah and the surrounding states! It’s a really messed up place to grow up and live. I do miss my silly family that still live there but I do miss the MOUNTAINS they’re magnificent but that’s all! They are not active in the church either! I’m now a Christian Pastor and very PROUD of that!! God Bless our children! And please talk to your kids and keep them safe and give them some extra information about their bodies and don’t let anyone use you!!

Donald J. Winfield

It's sexual congress/intercourse, period. A rose by any other name is still a very pretty flower. Rev. Don